Closet Enemies
by capm
Summary: Are the spies harboring hidden feelings toward one another? Can they work together again? Is this the end of the spies' friendship?


Closet Enemies  
  
It's closing in on the Winter Solstice dance and the spies each have their eyes set on David. They are all bound and determined to get him to go with them. In one-on-one conversations with David, they try to play up their common interests: Sam stresses their interest in science; Clover, in performing arts; and Alex, in sports. But David remains noncommittal.  
  
Mandy sees an opportunity to steer David her way and decides to tell David what the girls have confided to her as to what they really think of one another. Of course, they did no such thing, but David doesn't know that. She tells David that Clover gets referred to as a "Man-eater" because of all the boys she has gone out with and broken up with, Sam as a "Petty Intellectual" because she is smart, but also closed minded, and Alex as the "Duh Queen", because she is good at athletics but tends to struggle in class.  
  
The next day, the spy friends overhear David telling his friends about these assessments by, as Mandy has told him, the three have made of each other. Tearfully and angrily they look at one another and split in different directions, crying. They can't believe their best friends would say such things about them! This friendship is over!!!!  
  
In the ensuing days, they ignore one another, only speaking to each other when they have to.  
  
Soon, they get WOOHP'd, but Jerry can quickly see that something is very wrong – the spies are seated as far away as possible from each other on the round landing cushion, arms folded across their chests, and eyes cast down with angry looks on their faces.  
  
"Spies, what's wrong?" he asks.  
  
"Let's just get on with the mission!", snaps Clover.  
  
"It's a personal situation.", Alex adds irritably.  
  
"And really none of your business!", angrily adds Sam.  
  
"Well spies, there is no way you can be an effective team like this, so that MAKES it my business! Now please tell me what's wrong." insists Jerry.  
  
Alex starts crying and blurts out "My so called friends refer to me as the 'Duh Queen' behind my back!"  
  
"And they refer to me as a 'Man-eater' behind mine!", sobs Clover.  
  
"Behind my back, I am known as a 'Petty Intellectual' by my so called friends!" whimpers Sam.  
  
"Even if all this is true, which I doubt, what was your source for these characterizations?"  
  
"Well, we overheard David telling his friends that those were the terms we described each other as!" says Clover.  
  
"I see, second-hand information. Ladies, I'm going to ask the three of you to take a WOOHP lie detector test in the presence of each other, so we can get to the bottom of this!" says Jerry.  
  
"But can't those machines be fooled?" asks Sam.  
  
"The typical, low cost, garden variety ones can, but the WOOHP detectors have never been wrong!"  
  
"I'm ok with it," says Alex.  
  
"I don't know what more we'll find out, but OK.", says Clover.  
  
"I think it's a waste of time, but I'll do it.", says Sam.  
  
"Very well, Ladies. I'll get the machines." And Jerry leaves the gals in stony silence.  
  
He returns with four units.  
  
"Why four units Jerry?", asks Sam.  
  
"Because I will also wear one. I want the following discussion to be totally open and honest, and I want you three to see that it is as well." Jerry then fits each spy with a headband, armband, and leg band. He also dons the same bands. Jerry makes sure that he is standing in front of his desk, in full view of the spies, so that they can see that he is not secretly manipulating any hidden switches.  
  
"Please look at the screen behind my desk. You see four sets of red and green lights. Red indicates lie and green indicates true. Sam your unit is number 2, Clover your unit is number 3, Alex yours is number 4 and mine is number 1. I'll start."  
  
And Jerry begins "My name is Jerry (red and green lights go on). What that means spies is that the statement is half true. I have to use my formal name. So, my name is Gerald (green light). My name is Alfred (red light). So now you see how it works. Let's make sure your units are working as well. Girls, give me your name and a false name, and we'll check it. Sam, you start."  
  
"My name is Sam (red and green lights) (a little embarrassed, she says) I mean my name is Samantha (green light). My name is Jill (red light)"  
  
"Very good, Sam. Clover?" asks Jerry.  
  
"My name is Denise (red light). My name is Clover (green light)"  
  
"Good. Alex?" says Jerry.  
  
"My name is Alex (red and green lights) Sorry! I mean my name is Alexandra (green light). My name is Anne (red light)"  
  
"Very good, ladies. Now let's get down to business. Alex, have you ever referred to either Clover or Sam in a derogatory manner, especially to David?" asks Jerry.  
  
"No Jerry! (green light) I've always looked up to them! (green light)."  
  
"What about you, Clover?" asks Jerry. "No Jerry! (red light). Lie? I've never said anything derogatory about them! (red light)"  
  
"Clover", Alex says quietly, "remember the elevator? You said Sam had a know-it-all attitude!"  
  
"(blushing) I remember now, Alex, but I have never said anything derogatory to David (green light). That was the only derogatory thing I've ever said about either of you! I swear!! (green light) I wouldn't hurt my friends! (green light)"  
  
"And what about you, Sam", asks Jerry.  
  
"No Jerry, I have never cut my friends down (green light), not even to get a date with David (green light). Our friendship has always been my most prized possession (red and green lights), (adding embarrassingly and in a hushed tone) until recently (green light)."  
  
"Well girls," continues Jerry, as he removes the devices from the girls and himself, "the lie detectors show, as you have seen yourself, that none of you has ever characterized your friends in a negative manner, especially to David. You all seem to be the victims of a nasty rumor. I'll return these units now, and be back."  
  
The spies are left alone, not knowing what to say or how to say it.  
  
Finally, Alex starts crying and says "I'm sorry girlfriends! Can you EVER forgive me? I should have known you'd never talk behind my back! Please! Please, forgive me!!!"  
  
Both Sam and Clover come over to a sobbing Alex. They too are crying. They hug her tenderly, and each other.  
  
"There's nothing to forgive, Alex!" says Clover softly "I just hope you both can find it in your hearts to forgive me for thinking you would be that way!"  
  
Sam adds softly "I hope you can forgive me too. After all the years we've been best friends, how could I not have talked the situation over with you guys, before jumping to conclusions? I'm sorry!"  
  
The three are locked in a tender embrace as each says softly "Friends forever!".  
  
They then hear Jerry coming, and separate. They are seated close together on their landing pad now; closer than usual. Jerry realizes that the crisis has passed; they have made up and are friends again.  
  
"I am relieved to see that things are back to normal girls" says Jerry.  
  
"But why would David lie to his friends?", asks Clover.  
  
"Maybe he wasn't lying.", states Jerry.  
  
"Well, I'm confused", says Sam "the lie detectors showed we never said anything derogatory about one another, especially to David. How can he be telling the truth?"  
  
Jerry says, "Maybe because someone has fed him bad information. Someone who would want you girls out the way for some reason..."  
  
"Like getting asked to the Winter Solstice dance" opines Sam.  
  
"And getting rid of the competition!!", adds Clover.  
  
"Mandy!!!" all three exclaim.  
  
"And I heard that David was going to the dance with Mandy!", says Alex.  
  
"It appears that you may have your prime suspect." Says Jerry.  
  
"We can deal with her later, what's the mission Jerry?" asks Sam.  
  
"Are you up to it?" Jerry asks.  
  
"You bet!" says Sam.  
  
"Totally!" says Clover.  
  
"Let's kick some bad guy butt!" says Alex.  
  
"Splendid Ladies! Now here is your mission" and Jerry goes on to explain their assignment. It is a short, but important courier mission. The spies have to pick up an attaché case from the French consulate in New York and take it to the United Nations.  
  
The gals are provided laser lipsticks; bungee belts; jet-suction-digger go- go-boots; and K.I.R.T.T. (from episode 020 'Game Girls') for transportation.  
  
"OK, K.I.R.T.T.," says Sam, "Turn into security limo." K.I.R.T.T. complies. With Sam driving the gals are on their way to the French consulate.  
  
"I just can't believe how far that Mandy will go, to get what she wants!", exclaims Clover.  
  
"And I can't believe David would actually believe that guff about us being closet enemies!", says Alex.  
  
"Well, the last few days at school, we probably reinforced that message.", states Sam. She was right. David, on seeing how coldly the gals were treating one another, took that as verification, of what Mandy had told him.  
  
Arriving at the French consulate, the spies enter and are ushered into the presence of the ranking French diplomat. He gives them the attaché case and key to the handcuffs. Sam attaches the attaché case, via the cuffs to her wrist, and the spies are on their way to the United Nations. Clover is now the driver, and the spies instruct K.I.R.T.T. to change into an armored car for the trip.  
  
The mission is uneventful. The spies arrive at the United Nations and escort the attaché case to the Central Committee meeting, where the French minister receives the important information.  
  
Sam's compowder rings. "Excellent work, ladies!", says Jerry. "Another mission well done!"  
  
"Thanks, Jerry!", says Sam. "We'll be bringing K.I.R.T.T. back to WOOHP now."  
  
Of course, seeing that the mission is over, why not have a little fun?  
  
"K.I.R.T.T., change into a sports car convertible!", says Alex. K.I.R.T.T. complies, and the gals have an enjoyable, and sometimes white knuckled return to WOOHP, with Alex at the wheel.  
  
"Alex," teases Clover, "The next time you drive, let me know ahead of time! I want my crash helmet!" Sam giggles.  
  
Alex responds, "Crash helmet? I'll have you know I haven't scratched or dented my car for at least 36 hours!"  
  
"Quick! Contact _Ripley's Believe It or Not_! "jokes Sam. All three gals laugh. It's good to be best friends again!  
  
It is now the day before the Winter Solstice dance, and the day after the WOOHP mission, and all three gals corner David.  
  
"David, we need to talk to you!" says Clover sternly.  
  
A somewhat bewildered David says "OK."  
  
The gals appear to be angry with him and he doesn't know why.  
  
"David," starts Sam "we overheard you tell your friends that we refer to each other as the 'Petty Intellectual', 'Man-eater' and 'Duh Queen'. Who told you that?"  
  
"Well, I'm supposed to keep it a secret, (the gals give him a hard, angry look) but seeing it seems to be important to you, Mandy told me that's how you referred to each other in private." He responds.  
  
"Have you ever heard us refer to each other in those terms, David?", asks Clover.  
  
"No Clover. Frankly I was stunned when Mandy told me. But I understand that Mandy and you three are the best of friends, so I didn't question it. And seeing how you treated one another recently, I accepted it to be true.", replies David.  
  
"David, Mandy is no friend of mine, or of Sam and Clover's. She lied to you about us!", says Alex.  
  
"Well let's clear this up right now! There's Mandy. Mandy, please join us.", says David.  
  
But Mandy can see that her little ruse has been found out.  
  
"Oh ....ah... David! I really have to be going!" stammers Mandy.  
  
"This will only take a minute" says David, as he and the three girls surround her.  
  
"Mandy, you told me that Clover, Sam and Alex refer to each other in private as the 'Man-eater', the 'Petty Intellectual' and the 'Duh Queen'. Where did you hear that from?" asks David.  
  
"Well, a..David, you see.....I....they never really said that to me!" stammers a trapped Mandy.  
  
"Then why did you tell me they did?" asks David.  
  
Mandy blurts out "BECAUSE I WANTED TO GO TO THE WINTER SOLSTICE DANCE WITH YOU! And I wanted to get rid of the competition!"  
  
"I see", says David. "Well Mandy, as of right now the date is off!" David adds.  
  
"No!!! You can't do this to me!" shrieks Mandy.  
  
"No Mandy," David replies, "You can't do this to me! Using me, and having me believe that Clover, Sam and Alex are really closet enemies. It's off!!!"  
  
Mandy huffs away angrily "Fine then! I can always get a date, but you will be without one! HAH!"  
  
David says "That's true, but I don't want to date someone who spreads lies!"  
  
"Ah... David?" the three girl ask softly "You know we don't have any dates for the Winter Solstice dance either...would you consider going with all three of us?"  
  
David smiles broadly saying, "That would be rad! And it'll be a lot of fun too. Say I pick the three of you up between 7 and 8 tomorrow? We can get a pizza afterwards. What do you say?"  
  
"We'll be ready," the gals happily say in unison. 


End file.
